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  • Miss Quantum

Has "Masculinity" Become a Dirty Word?

Written By: Chris O'Leary Former 10 years of Active Duty at U.S. Marine Corps 1989-2000

"It hasn't.

Coming from the manliest of manly men.

I'm a bald, bearded burly bumbling briary bastard built of beer, brats, BBQ, bacon and baseball. I burp, fart, scratch and stink up the bathroom so badly the EPA sends me warning letters.

My emotional well being is wrapped up in the draft day performance of the Miami Dolphins, the Texas Rangers, the Dallas Mavericks and the Dallas Stars, in that order. I engage in long passionate discussions about craft beer and whiskey, I can absolutely manage to carry 27 grocery bags into the house at once and my answer to every problem begins with WD-40, ends with duct tape, and almost certainly at some point involves a reciprocating saw.

Send me to the hardware store for a screw, and I WILL come home with a power tool.

I'm pretty sure grass fed steak counts as a vegetable.

I can be counted on to kill spiders, unclog drains, hang shelves level, assemble furniture with very few pieces left over (probably not entirely necessary) and I don't bake, I barbecue.

It bothers me that it takes more than one product to shower, shave my head and brush my teeth.

You know with all the talk about how outlawed masculinity suddenly is, I wonder how it is I haven't been arrested.

I think I have the answer though. Maybe. Just maybe people don't actually have a problem with masculinity.

Maybe, just maybe, people think the world would be better if people stopped acting like arse-holes.

Maybe we could stop confusing “being an arsehole” with “masculinity.”

The manly men of the world and the women who love us would greatly appreciate it."

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