One of the absolute easiest ways of minimizing and justifying another person's actions is by throwing on a cape and taking a flying leap atop the moral high ground.
Up, up ----and away! Let's go!
This is exactly how it happens...
First you take offense at something and become angry, feeling jilted, and insulted at something someone else does or says. This then allows you to find cause to blame the other for "making you feel like this." Then you double down with intensifying anger, blame and wind yourself up like a toy.
This could be over a decision that you feel you have a right to claim an ownership in, or not - no matter. It must only be a tiny thing that does not align with your values or morals - or it could be an understandable, slight mistake.... you only need a sliver of a crack into which to stick your lever so that it can be inserted and dug into, turning molehills into mountains.
At that point you know you dislike whatever it is - so you feel slighted, vexed, insulted ---and you are feeling really offended. This at that point enables you to accuse the other for "making you feel" like this. So you two-fold down with a heightening annoyance and fault the other person for "getting you twisted up."
To wrap it up...
You reason that the other individual must be rebuffed or punished. To be sure, it is your obligation to see that it is enforced that they pay dearly, in some way, for their horrible disappointment(s). So now you can scrap assentions, be unkind or generally act in manners that reason them trouble or gives you a chance to act totally egotistically and with foolish pride.
It appears a pathetic, tragic activity, however huge numbers of people do this, somehow and shockingly--- quite regularly.
Without a doubt, it can turn into a propensity, giving us a simple method to dodge obligation and behave egotistically. We as a whole look to legitimize what we do, regardless of whether we furtively know it isn't right.
What's more, faulting others is a straightforward method to do this.
Works like magic!
And it is ... gross.